Book ~ "If I Knew Then: Finding Wisdom in Failure and Power in Aging" (2020) Jann Arden

From Goodreads ~ Digging deep into her strengths, her failures and her losses, Jann Arden brings us an inspiring account of how she has surprised herself, in her fifties, by at last becoming completely her own person. Like many women, it took Jann a long time to realize that trying to be pleasing and likeable and beautiful in the eyes of others was a loser's game. Letting it rip, and damning the consequences, is not only liberating, it's a hell of a lot of fun: "Being the age I am - that so many women are  - is just the best time of my life."

Jann weaves her own story together with tales of her mother, grandmother and great grandmother, and the father she came close to hating, to show her younger self - and all of us - that fear and avoidance is no way to live. "What I'm thinking about now aren't all the ways I can try to hang on to my youth or all the seconds ticking by in some kind of morbid countdown to death," she writes, "but rather how I keep becoming someone I always hoped I could be. If I'm lucky one day a very old face will look back at me from the mirror, a face I once shied away from. I will love that old woman ferociously, because she has finally figured out how to live a life of purpose - not in spite of but because of all her mistakes and failures." 

Jann Arden is Canadian singer, songwriter, broadcaster, actor and author, who is now in her late 50s.  Her parents passed away in the last five years ... her father spent years being ill, including dementia, and her mother battled Alzheimer's.  

Jann talks about her family dynamic including the difficult relationship she had with her father, who was an alcoholic and not a happy man.  She loved her mother, who stayed and took care of her father for over 60 years.  Jann tells of the lessons she has learned over the years, of not being happy with her body but being more at peace with it as she gets older, of giving up alcohol and liking the person she has become without it, and how the crazy childhood she had of hiding in the basement to escape her father led her to become a musician because in the dreary basement she had records to keep her company.

This is the third book of Jann's I've read and I liked it.  Her personality comes through and I felt like she was sitting with me and chatting. I liked the writing style ... it was amusing at times and honest.  As a head's up, there is swearing.

Book ~ "Feeding My Mother: Comfort and Laughter in the Kitchen as My Mom Lives with Memory Loss" (2017) Jann Arden

From Goodreads ~ Based on her hugely popular Facebook posts and Instagram photos, "Feeding My Mother" is a frank, funny, inspirational and piercingly honest account of the transformation in Jann Arden's life that has turned her into the primary "parent" to her mom, who is in the grip of Alzheimer's. 

Jann Arden moved in to a house just across the way from her parents in rural Alberta to be close to them but also so they could be her refuge from the demands of the music business and a performing career. Funny how time works. 

Since her dad died in 2015, Jann cooks for her mom five or six times a week. Her mom finds comfort in her daughter's kitchen, not just in the delicious food but also just sitting with her as she cooks. And Jann finds some peace in caring for her mom, even as her mom slowly becomes a stranger. "If you told me two years ago that I'd be here," Jann writes, "I wouldn't have believed it. And yet we still fall into so much laughter, feel so much insane gladness and joy. It's such a contrast from one minute to the next and it teaches me constantly: it makes me stronger and more humble and more empathetic and caring and kind." 

The many people who are dealing with a loved one who is losing it will find inspiration and strength in Jann's wholehearted, loving response and her totally Jann take on the upside-down world of a daughter mothering her mother. "Feeding My Mother" is one heck of an affirmation that life just keeps on keeping on and a wonderful example of how you have to roll with it. 

Jann Arden is Canadian singer, songwriter, broadcaster, actor and author.  She lived next door to her parents in rural Alberta.  Her father, Derrel, passed away in August 2015 after years of being ill, including dementia.  Her mother, Joan, still lives next door.  She is battling Alzheimer's and needs round-the-clock care.

This book is Jann's journey of taking care of her parents and watching them decline over the last eight years but being helpless to do anything about it.  She started cooking for them (there were days when they couldn't remember how use a can opener) and throughout the book are recipes of some of things she's made ... like turkey chili, chicken parm, split pea soup and pulled chicken noodle soup.  Also scattered throughout the book are pictures of Jann, her parents and their pets.

This is the second book of Jann's I've read (I read Falling Backwards a couple years ago and enjoyed it).  Despite the difficult subject, I enjoyed this book and Jann's personality comes through and I felt like she was sitting with me and chatting.  I liked the writing style ... it was amusing at times and honest.

Book ~ "Falling Backwards" (2011) Jann Arden

From Goodreads ~ This long-time darling of the music industry and singer-songwriter of international renown will capture your heart - and keep you in stitches - with her powerful stories about coming of age as an artist and as a human being. 

 Jann's legions of fans are drawn to her sincerity, wit, humour and that infectious sparkle she brings to everything she does. Oh, and did we mention her sense of humour? Jann's natural comedic talents translate seamlessly into her writing, and her dedicated fans will delight in the details of this memoir--where there is no such thing as too much information. 

Readers will learn about how her brother used to steal her maxi pads to repurpose as GI Joe bunk beds and how she once got gum stuck in her hair so badly that when she woke up her head was glued to the pillow. But with the good times come the bad and Jann opens up about the darker side of her so-called prairie-perfect nuclear family and the first signs that her brother was a uniquely troubled young man. Jann's readable prose keeps the reader tuned in as she reminds us of the inestimable value of having a teacher who believes in you, wide-open spaces to play and be a child and a good mother. 

Though I like Jann Arden's music, I was drawn to read her book because of her appearances on the Rick Mercer Report.  I liked her interactions with Rick Mercer and she's seemed like a hoot.  I enjoyed this book and her personality comes through.

Jann tells her story of the family's beginnings in Calgary and her early years there.  The family moved outside Calgary to the country when she was young.  While initially devastated, she quickly adapted by becoming friends with Leonard and Dale who taught her how to shoot a gun and a bow and arrow and they would take rides around the countryside on Snoopy, their big horse.

She tells of trying to figure out what she wanted to do with her life.  She realized that she wanted to be a singer and moved to Vancouver to make that happen.  Except it didn't and she ended up working a variety of jobs including busking in a touristy part of Vancouver and on a salmon fishing boat.  Miserable she moved back home a couple years later and eventually made the right connections and became the recording artist she is today.

I liked the writing style ... it was funny and sarcastic.  But it was also honest as she talks about her older brother's problems with the law, her father's alcoholism, the abuse she put herself through as she was trying to find herself, etc.

Jann and I were born the same year so I could relate to a lot of what she talked about.  Like Jann, we thought nothing of riding our bikes wherever we wanted and be gone all day, walking to school on our own, etc.  She tells the story of her mom making lunches for school.  She opened her thermos one day and there was a cooked wiener inside.  Because it had sat in hot water all morning, it was huge.  I can dig it as my mother did that when I was a kid too ... I thought I was the only one!  My mother would also wrap up a bun or a piece of bread with ketchup and mustard to make it a hot dog ... except the ketchup and mustard became glue and I wouldn't be able to pry it apart so I'd eat them separately.